I haven’t forgotten about my real estate obsession

My latest rant is regarding the Fed, and possible plans to “fix” the mortgage market. Hello? The mortgage market in my humble and uneducated opinion was running its course. Supply and demand, with a little greed thrown in, at its finest.

This NPR story really took me over the top on this issue…
specifically the interview with Sheri Stinson of Minneapolis, who earns $2,000 a month and who’s mortgage payment just jumped an additional $500… to $1,800. And she has two kids and a car payment, and you know, food to buy…. If her payments had stayed at $1,300 a month she still couldn’t make ends meet.

I’m sorry there are people in a bind. I want to buy a home too, but over the last year or two I looked at 1. my income. 2. the price of real estate 3. how much I can put down and 4. my income.

Did I mention MY INCOME??? NOT what I am approved for.

So now, my tax dollars, which are significant (not in a Bill Gates kind of way) since I HAVE NO WRITE OFFS, are supposed to help out someone who got in over their head? who didn’t read the fine print? Didn’t understand variable interest rates?
OR worse, to bail out some mortgage company or bank…

I certainly don’t wish anyone ill will, but there is no guarantee in this country that says you get to own a house. Hell we don’t even guarantee everyone access to health care.

yes I’m neurotic

Aren’t we all?

I know I just posted that very negative post. I wrote it earlier. I don’t feel that bad anymore, but it did feel cathartic to expunge it from my body. To get those words out of my head… So please, don’t feel you need to comment with words of support. I DO know I have friends out there in the universe, in the blogosphere, and even here in my home, in my neighborhood and in my cobbled together family.

and if you are feeling bad, check out Jen Lemen’s blog. I met her at Blogher in New York.

No, Non, Niet, Nein, Nao, No y No

… and yet another “rejection” for my pile…

no scholarship for the Taos Summer Writers Conference from the A Room of Her Own foundation. And even though on my last post I said I wasn’t hopeful, I lied. I was still hopeful.

And no letter even.
Not even a thank-you-for-your-application- but-you-suck form letter.
Nope. I actually had to ask them, thus making me feel even more pathetic.

I busted my ass to put together the application, with the vague requirements of “10 pages of prose” and a short description of your work… or a cover letter, or whatever. I stressed about what to include, should I just submit what I would be working on in Taos? Should I show the broader scope of my writing abilities? No one seemed to know, everyone had a different opinion, so I was flying blind. There was no information about what kind of recipients have been awarded scholarships in the past. No way to gauge the bar. I mean what if all the recipients in the past already had MFAs and were English professors or published authors? I still would have submitted, but at least I would know the odds were not in my favor. Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten my hopes up.

So now, I’m sitting here thinking I totally suck. Yesterday I was thinking maybe just maybe it could be me. Why not me? well apparently I’m not good enough.

Not sure I’m cut out for this putting myself out there shit. How do you keep doing it, and getting rejection after rejection?

How do I reprogram the tape player in my head that is saying you suck you suck you suck????

Performing Your Words

Guy Kawasaki has some great tips on his blog on public speaking, gleaned from a buddy, Doug Lawrence, professional singer, music director, and speech coach. Anyone reading at the LA Bloggers Live event may want to take a gander.

Singing and speaking have everything in common—except for maybe really good tunes. The main goal is to engage your audience and make them listen to you, so everything a singer does, a speaker ought to do too. Here are the absolute necessities of an engaging performance or presentation that Doug compiled…..

And you may want to peruse the tips from Toastmasters on public speaking.

I would add:

1. Make sure to BREATHE.

2. S L O W D O W N

3. Don’t be afraid of silence…. it is a useful tool that lets the audience absorb what you just said, and pay attention to what you’re going to say next.

4. Vary the rhythm and pitch of your voice.

…and finally….

5. Practice. Even if it is just running through the words a couple of times.

Interested in spoken word as art? Well so Theresa Cowan….

While spoken word performers have been around for over two decades in North America, their work has not been studied seriously by academics as an art form worthy of their consideration. Theresa Cowan is working to change this neglect through her research for her PhD in English (under the supervision of Dr. Michael O’Driscoll) that examines spoken word performance in Canada. “I initially became interested in this work because I am a spoken word artist and I found that many ‘academic poets’ made fun of spoken word as ‘bad poetry,’ rather than engage with it on its own terms.”

Do you think PhD candidates in English will soon be studying blogging as an art form? Do YOU think bloggers are writers?

Many of the bloggers I enjoy reading are good writers… personally I wouldn’t call all bloggers writers, however. Some create lists of links, for example.

Curious what you think….

See Me Live

Thursday, June 28.

Yes, I know I am not based in L.A.

HOWEVER, I do read some L.A. Bloggers like LeahPeah, and CitizenoftheMonth (although I may have to stop reading that one since Neil called me a narcissistic fool)

BESIDES, there’s no cool blogging stuff like this happening in San Diego since Joe and Leah moved “up there,” so I’m going.

And if you show up you’ll get to hear me live, along with:

Erin from Queen of Spain

Joe from Artlung

Lynda from One Day at a Time

Deezee from Confessional Highway

Neil from Citizen of the Month

Abigail from My Life According to Me

Maybe I’ll steal the idea and bring it to San Diego.

Or maybe you’ll just have to catch me in LA.

And tell an LA friend. The club, the Tangier Lounge looks cool.

SO. Should I do a reprise of the Me and Billy Crystal audio blog? guaranteed to bring the crowd to tears – OR – something about Barbie and pert boobs?

and the hits, they keep a comin’

So now I find out I didn’t get a Leo Love Merit scholarship to the Taos Writers Conference.

No word about the Room of Her Own Foundation scholarship yet, but so far what I have is:

1. Public Radio Talent Quest. Rejected. but seriously, congrats to the round 1 winners
2. Leo Love Merit Scholarship. Rejected.
3. Room of Her Own scholarship… pending… but not hopeful at this point
4. Story submitted to CommonTies.com … pending… won’t know until the 22nd

So think happy thoughts. Not sure if I can take 4 rejections in a row. Or at least this close together.

Anyone have any tips on how to toughen up? to not let this stuff get to you? to keep plugging away regardless? to get up and do it again tomorrow and the next day? or how do you know when you’re just kidding yourself?